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Complete falling apart

Discussion in 'Crystal Vales' started by Rey Solo, Oct 5, 2019.

  1. Rey Solo

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    28th October, @Kylo Ren

    All at once, Rey came back to herself before collapsing heavily onto the forest floor. Around her was destruction; trees which had been split by her saber, the faint smell of burning from the contact of the saberstaff against the ground, the bushes- anything it had been able to find.

    Her fists curled against the ground as she tried to gain purchase but left it as another sob wracked through her. She was not far from the back door, in the forest which backed onto the house. BB-8 had emerged, slowly approaching her, having had the sense to leave her while she had taken out her anger on everything around her.

    Rey curled in on herself, one hand covering her eyes, the other hung limp out in front of her with the saberstaff hilt just resting in it. She had not felt a rage like this come over her since that night she had wrecked half of her shop. She was shaking; her hair had fallen halfway out of her buns and there was blood welling on her lower arm where she'd caught herself on a low lying branch in her anger. None of that came close to permeating with her mind though, right now, because Connor was gone. It was as simple as that. This world had taken something else from her and she felt like she had nothing else. Each time she got up and tried to carry on, she was hurt again and she wasn't sure how much more she could take.

    She didn't know what time it was. Connor had woken her up that morning, they were meant to be spending that time together. He had wrapped his arms around her before saying he was going to start on breakfast. She'd got dressed and had been putting her hair into her buns before she'd heard a smash from the kitchen, "Connor?" She shouted, still fixing her hair as she walked through. In the middle of the room, far away from any sides or the table, were two smashed bowls. Behind the sight, BB-8 was rocking back and forth, unusually silent. Rey blinked at the bowl, not really understanding initially and looking around, "Connor?" She shouted again. BB-8 remained silent as she dove in and out of rooms before the panic and realisation had set in, only confirmed by BB-8 who had weakly told her what he had witnessed. The vines had sprung up out of the floor. Connor was gone.

    Everything was a bit of a blur after that.

    It was too much to bear, thinking about being in Pandora without Connor. They'd been through so much, they had a home together and they'd made the most of what this world had given them. Now he was back in his world and she was still here, without him. Each time she thought about him her tears begun again, her vision of the trees in front of her blurred.

     
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  2. Kylo Ren

    Kylo Ren Star Wars

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    Something was wrong.

    He could feel it in the Force thickly as he approached the quaint cottage, nestled so neatly amidst the forest. He was making good on his promise–to himself, at least– to check in on Rey and Connor more often, to keep people in his life rather than pushing them away just because he was miserable. And truly, he wasn't, not as horribly as he could be. The wound of the lost bond ached, the loss of Jaesa ached, especially given how she'd returned– but at least she was here. At least she was safe. And Kylo knew his only option to move on.

    Keeping around people, he'd realized, helped. Revan, Rey, Connor.

    But though nothing seemed amiss as he approached the building from the from, he did notice a... quiet. The kind of quiet that fell in the wake of turmoil.

    He knocked at the door, and when it wasn't answered, began to move around the building. "Rey?" he called, as he rounded the side of the house, towards the space at the back. "Connor?" He could sense her– close by. And that wrongness. He broke into a jog, tightening down on that sense in the Force and let it pull him to her, until he found her, curled up and bleeding and alone.

    He paused there, took a steadying breath, fearing the worst, and reached out with the Force– his eyes such, and he searched for any sign of another life, of Connor's life. Nothing. Dark eyes opened, and Kylo knelt before the broken woman. "Is he gone?" He asked, tone low and even, not letting himself consider the loss until it was confirmed.

     
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  3. Rey Solo

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    Rey didn't have the strength to move, or the will. Her raw anger had burned through but it was still there, underlying her emotions in full. She couldn't control it as it burned under her fingertips. This world had taken everything from her. BB-8 had gone off somewhere, she just lay there in the meantime, hurting.

    She felt the spark in the Force before Kylo arrived but it was so mixed up with her rambling thoughts and emotions she didn't pay it much thought until he was kneeling in front of her. She slowly peeled her hand back from her eyes as her tears continued to roll down her face and she slowly nodded as her face crumpled.

    "The vines." She croaked, her fingers curling up into a fist. While she mainly just felt the loss, she was angry too, angry the life she had built here had been snatched from her once again. Each time she thought her life was settling here, the world seemed to intervene and strip it all from her.

     
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  4. Kylo Ren

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    The Vines.

    No. Not again. Not to her.

    He remained still a moment, and then he shook his head almost involuntarily. His lips parted, but there were no words. There was nothing he could say or offer to ease this. Except that he knew, finally, he knew what this loss was like– but it had still not befallen him in a moment of happiness, in a time of blissful unawares. His relationship had been dying anyways. Hers had been strong, vibrant, alive.

    With a sharp exhale he abruptly drew his fist back and slammed it into the dirt, his jaw clenching so tightly it ached. He hated that this had befallen her again, someone who didn't deserve it. If he could take it on, add the pain to his own, he would have. Pandora... Pandora was rotten.

    After another moment, he forced himself to take a breath, to soften, to land his attention at Rey. Blood slowly trickled from a wound in her arm, and around them, he noticed the carnage of whatever rage had befallen her. A fire that had gone cold, however– all she had then was the pain and the tears. She couldn't stay there.

    Slowly, he reached for her, his hands gentle at first until she didn't push him away. Then, all at once, he got his legs under him and lifted her from the ground. Then, carrying her, he turned. Briefly, he debated taking her back inside the cottage– but that idea was quickly dismissed. She'd never left for work that day, and so she must have seen him... the scene would remain in there. He wouldn't take her back to face it, not that day. So instead he moved towards where her ship was parked.

    "It should have been anyone but him. I'm sorry," he muttered as he went, glancing down at her.


     
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  5. Rey Solo

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    Rey had felt the horrible sensation of deja vu, but at least this time she wasn't alone out in the desert. There, she had expected death, knowing the ways of the desert and its harsh laws. She couldn't calm herself down and the sobs wracked through her entire body and left her shaking. She couldn't stand this, she couldn't stand going through this again and rebuilding her life again.

    She was glad he didn't try and comfort her because she didn't feel like anything he might have to say wold do any good here. She was beyond words. What good were they? Pandora had shot through all her hopes and dreams with the two times she had tried to build some kind of life here, the kind of one she had always wanted.

    When Kylo scooped her up, she din't resist and curled into his chest, still sobbing. One hand held her saberstaff, but apart from that she was limp in his arms. She didn't have the energy to be anything other than that. She didn't care where he was taking her; she didn't care about anything right now. "I'm cursed. Every time I think everything is going okay-" She broke off as another sob ran through her.

     
  6. Kylo Ren

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    Her sobs shook her frail body in his arms, and Kylo only held tightly, willing her just to hang in there. He didn't bother to make her promises, that this would get better, that things would be alright– because what did he know of such a thing? He was only horribly, horribly sorry, as though he could have done anything to stop it. Him and Rey were a strange sort of friends, but he knew their bond was real, from a long and complicated history, and that for her he would do just about anything. There was nothing romantic about it. She was just the kind of person that made him want to be there.

    "That's not true," he said flatly, though not unkindly. Though he couldn't honestly blame her for feeling that way. "It's this place. This place is cursed."

    BB-8 rolled slowly up from the cottage, as though unsure if he should approach. Kylo didn't stop, only told the droid as they passed, "I've got her. Take care of things here, and I'll be back." But he was getting her out of the damned woods.

    He reached her ship, used the Force to open the doors and bring her inside. There, he turned towards the ship's quarters, maneuvering carefully to make sure he didn't bang Rey's head or feet on anything. He set her down carefully on the bed inside, standing at her side, and there took her arm in his hands to turn it and look at the wound. A jagged thing, clotting on its own but still dirty. "Where do you keep bandages?" he asked, trying to sound and appear calm despite the situation.

     
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  7. Rey Solo

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    Rey felt like he couldn't have been more wrong. Of course she was cursed. Every meaningful relationship, aside from rebuilding her friendship with Kylo, was now dead in the ground. Even though Jaesa had come back, she didn't remember her and Rey was nothing more than a stranger. Ben had gone, so had the women she had loved working with in her shop in Pandora City, Anakin too, the friendship she'd built up with the younger Luke had ended abruptly and now to finish it off, Connor too had disappeared. When looking at it in that way, how could she come to any other conclusion aside from that she was cursed? She completely believed it but did not have the energy to fight against Kylo's words. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she shook her head silently; he was wrong. She was cursed. She had tried to escape the isolation Jakku had left her with for all those years but it kept creeping up on her all the same.

    She closed her eyes, like that would somehow help until she felt herself laid out on her bed. At first she didn't respond to Kylo, not because she didn't want her arm healing, but because it was all underlining the conclusions he was coming to in the first place. The First Aid kit, where the bandages were, which she had stashed on the ship was the one she and Ben had put together given the amount of accidents they had used to had together at their respective work places. He should have known where it was, but he didn't because this place had destroyed her marriage and then brought him back with no memory of it and from a different time, before their bond. Anger was starting to bubble up instead of grief, not at Kylo at all, but at this place, at what it kept doing to her.

    She wasn't crying hysterically anymore, the tears rolled effortlessly down her cheeks and onto the sheets below her. "Under a panel in the control room." She finally got out. Her base instincts were kicking in. She wanted to run away, find some small corner of the universe where no one could find or hurt her ever again. Rey watched him for a moment then let her head fall to the side again, making no move to make herself more comfortable or to do anything.

     
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  8. Kylo Ren

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    Kylo gave a short nod, and didn’t linger before he turned to find what she’d described. And when he came back, he decided not to bring attention to her defeated stature, the pain so intense it brought a numbness to her eyes. He simply went to work, cleaning the wound as effectively and efficiently as he would if she were in any other state. He didn’t think that babying her, trying to insist things would be okay, would go very far.

    There was quiet for a bit, until he finished cleaning the wound and began to lay out a strip of gauze long enough to cover and protect it. He tore off a strip of adhesive with one hand and his teeth, and used it to secure the gaze on all sides. “For tonight, we can go to one of the nearby towns. Stay there, where you won’t be surrounded by…” he let his words taper off, not wanting to fill in the blank so bluntly. “If you’ll let me,” he added, and glanced towards her tear-stained face.

     
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  9. Rey Solo

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    Rey didn't do much while Kylo set about cleaning her wound. She trusted him and so didn't feel like she needed to watch him or observe what he was doing. She didn't have the energy to anyway. Right now, she didn't want to do anything beyond just lying here and doing absolutely nothing. She could sense when he was coming to an end of tending the wound and she rolled her eyes around so she was looking at him as he spoke.

    She went to answer but couldn't; it stuck in her throat. "I'm not coming back here. I can't." She insisted in a small voice as her eyes became wet again. When Ben had left her, the world had literally been torn up around her. She hadn't had a home to return to in the end, there was no reminder of the place she and Ben had been in, she had made her own life again slowly, but this place now felt like a reminder of what she had lost and what she could never have. This world kept tearing that life from her, each time she had thought she might have some semblance of normality and something to cling to, this world tore it from her. Aside from Kylo, she felt like she had nothing left.

    This world was quickly becoming sour in Rey's eyes, but her own world was nothing better. She knew what would probably await her there, so it felt like every avenue was mired in pain. "I'll go with you." Rey finally added, still feeling like she was fighting down her urge to flee on the ship and never look back.

     
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  10. Kylo Ren

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    Kylo wasn’t sure what he had expected– her to disagree, perhaps, and want to stay and mourn, or her to want to be alone. But somehow what she said felt like the worst. That she couldn’t even stand to be here, not at all. This beautiful place she’d poured so much of herself into… It was now a center of heart break, agony, for Rey. That fact saddened Kylo, for her, more than he could have said.

    So he met her gaze, nodded firmly, promise blazing in his gaze as she said she would come with him. If that was what she wanted, then it would be done. “Okay,” he replied simply. “Then I’ll take care of it all. I’ll take you to the town, and then I can come back for BB-8 and your things. And then we’ll go. Alright?” The wound secure, he let her arm go back at her side, but moved his hand to cover her bicep in a touch of quiet comfort.

     
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  11. Rey Solo

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    Rey looked at where his hand covered her arm and then her gaze slowly found his gaze again. She wanted to leave this place, she couldn't stay here, not when everything would remind her of Connor and the life they had been building. Everything, even looking at the fixed roof, just served as a reminder. He'd been so full of life, so caring, and now if he returned to Pandora he wouldn't even know who she was. Even the thought made the frustration she felt bubble up beneath her skin. She kept coming back to the quiet question of why her? Why was this happening to her? What had she done?

    Rey nodded, it was a better plan that the one which had been half formed in her head, to just flee wherever her ship would take her and decide what to do from there. "Okay." She agreed quietly, wiping her eyes with the hand Kylo was not covering as she tilted her head towards him. It was a silver lining that she still had Kylo, that he would look after her and she trusted him without a shadow of a doubt to do that. "T-thank you." She hiccuped as she tried to fight down a fresh wave of tears, curling onto her side.

     
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  12. Kylo Ren

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    "Mhm." Kylo's gaze lingered over her a moment longer before he stepped back, his hand sliding away. "If you need something... you know." He'd be close by. He turned then and walked from the room, instead following the corridors to the ship's controls.

    The flight to the town didn't take long at all, and Kylo set the ship down in the forests outside of it. As soon as everything was set to go, he returned to Rey, pausing halfway through the door to where she lay. "Hey– we're here. Are you alright to get up?" He didn't mean her emotional state... that would hardly be a worthwhile question. He was more looking to make sure there wasn't a wound he didn't know about, or if she would be able to get herself upright and walking long enough to reach the inn.

     
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  13. Rey Solo

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    Rey curled into herself and closed her eyes when Kylo left her room and she didn't stir again until she felt the ship land and she heard him come back in. She didn't really want to move. Nothing made her want to do anything right now but she knew she would have to. Rey slowly nodded her head and pushed herself up slowly. She wasn't injured, but her head was throbbing so badly she felt like she might empty the contents of her stomach.

    "Where are we?" She asked slowly, rubbing her hands over he eyes. She just wanted to curl up and sleep somewhere for a long time. Her emotions were still turbulent and bubbling beneath the surface, threatening to spill over. She was still in shock at what had happened as she walked over to Kylo, feeling a little lost.

     
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  14. Kylo Ren

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    He waited patiently as Rey pushed herself to stand up, ready to move forward if she stumbled. But she kept steady, at least as far as it took her to reach the door, and then turned to lead the way out. "I'm not sure of its name– it's a town on the edge of Crystal Vales. Small. Quiet." Hopefully one she hadn't been to with Connor before. But he'd stopped before, on a hunting job earlier that month. There was an inn they could stay at with a tavern below, with food and drink.

    He led the way outside, and there paused, glancing back at Rey. When she was near enough, he lifted an arm and laid his fingers lightly between her shoulders, to guide her along and make sure she didn't fall behind. "It's just this way," he muttered, and led them toward where the tree line ended, and instead there was a mill running at the outskirts of the town. The sun was setting steadily, there was a cool breeze in the air, and the leaves of the trees around them had leaves of golds, reds, oranges. A beautiful scene, if overcast by the mood of the approaching evening.

    He didn't bother speaking as he led the way toward the inn, his hand eventually falling back to his side as they went.

     
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  15. Rey Solo

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    Rey just let Kylo guide her because she was sure that if she had just been left to her own devices she would have fallen behind. It wasn't that she didn't want to do this but her head was elsewhere. She didn't know what she was doing anymore. Yesterday she'd had so many plans, even as close as a couple of hours ago but now those dreams lay in tatters and she was back to square one. She did slow a little when Kylo's hand left her shoulders; for once she was not distracted with the plans and wildlife around her. She didn't take any notice of anything. Right now she didn't care about anything.

    She didn't recognise the inn, she had not been here before and was glad of it. It seemed quiet, like Kylo had said and she shivered as night had begun to set in. There was a quick wash of panic over her and she looked backwards but had lost sight of the ship as they were about to cross the threshold of the inn, "My money-." She stopped short, pointing back to the ship, feeling pathetic as she did.

     
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  16. Kylo Ren

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    Kylo only shook his head, his hand finding her shoulder again to turn her back towards the inn. "I've got it, Rey," he replied, like she should have known that. And he approached the door, let them both inside– where it was warm, cozy lantern light all that illuminated the tavern, where sparse customers were largely minding their own business. The innkeeper greeted them, and Kylo managed a slim smile in response before he went straight to what he needed: "One room, two beds. Just for the night."

    "Ah, travelers, then? Stopping in?" Kylo shrugged, passed over the money. "Sure." The innkeeper rolled their eyes, but grumbled the directions to the room, gave him the key. But he first stepped back to Rey. "Do you want food or anything?"

     
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  17. Rey Solo

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    Rey felt like something about her independence wanted to protest, but it died as a mere thought because she didn't have the will and didn't know why she was bothering in the first place. She just followed Kylo, keeping quiet as he asked for the rooms. She didn't pay attention to any of the others, she just kept her eyes either fixed on Kylo or downwards.

    When the suggestion came, Rey realised that she hadn't eaten all day, however, the thought of food turned her stomach. She just shook her head, not feeling like she could explain why she didn't have an appetite. Rey moved a little closer to Kylo, looking down away from the inn keeper who looked her up and down. She hadn't considered what she looked like. Her mind was racing again, a dozen questions working their way in. What was she going to do now? What was next?

    "Can we just go to the room?" She asked him gently. She didn't want to be around other people right now.

     
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  18. Kylo Ren

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    Rey shook her head, and for the moment, Kylo was willing to oblige– even if he kept in mind to all but force her to eat something later, anyways. So instead, he just nodded, and followed the innkeeper's gesture towards a set of stairs at the back of the room.

    His had at Rey's back, his touch light, guided her in front of him, as they ascended from the tavern area to a long hallway upstairs lined with doors. He glanced at the key in his hand, labeled with a number, and led them to that room; after unlocking it, he swung the door open to allow them both inside.

    The room wasn't the spaciest, but there were two separate beds that looked at least... relatively clean, considering the less than modern state of everything in Cascade Bay. He went for the closest one and stood by it, claiming it subtly with his presence; instinct telling him to keep between Rey and the door during the night. Then he turned, to see Rey as she came in. He waited to see if she'd just collapse in the bed, but also had himself available to... try and talk, he supposed, if she wanted. He doubted there was anything else he could really do, given the situation.

     
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  19. Rey Solo

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    It would not have mattered to Rey in those moments if they had been in the nicest or darkest inn she had ever been to in her time in Pandora. She didn't notice any of the decor and could not have even said how far they had walked by the time they got to the room. Everything felt like it was happening around her, not to her. It felt strange, like her mind wasn't inside her body, somehow detached instead. When the door opened she stepped inside but didn't move to do anything else. It wasn't the biggest room ever, but more spacious than her AT-AT.

    Then there was silence. The door was shut, the setting sun cast a long shadow over everything in the room. She was quiet and still for a moment, still stood near the door frame as she looked at the space then at Kylo. She could feel her heart pounding against her chest as her anger threatened to bubble over. Why had this happened to her again? Was it something she had done? Did the Gods of this world really hate her that much?

    "This wasn't supposed to happen." Her voice was still breaking but there was a clear anger there too, not directed at Kylo but at this world, "Not again."

     
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  20. Kylo Ren

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    Before she spoke, Kylo sensed the anger rise abruptly in Rey as the Force around her stiffened. Kylo only could listen, to take a slow breath, trying to stay calm for himself. "I know, Rey. I know." He frowned, gaze watching her with sympathy. His own loss was still more raw than not to him, but somehow he was able to put it off, to focus on her pain instead.

    "It's just... the nature of this place. It gives and it takes, and it took– I'm sorry." He sighed heavily.

     
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