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Open Pls Ask Before Petting My Cock

Discussion in 'Centria' started by Eliot Waugh, Oct 9, 2018.

  1. Eliot Waugh

    Eliot Waugh The Magicians

    Posts:
    136
    Gender:
    Male
    Race:
    Human/Magician
    Age:
    24
    Alignment:
    Chaotic Good
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    link
    [​IMG]


    October 2nd, Year 108
    Open!



    The farm air - oh. my. god.
    Eliot didn't know why he's thought it a good idea to walk all the way here just for some decent carrots, really, but clearly he hadn't paused long enough to truly think about this.
    Because it had been a bad idea. A terrible, terrible idea.
    He was having flashbacks to times he really didn't ever want to remember, which was why his steps were so hurried across the muddy (it ruined his beautiful shoes) path which would lead him back to Ark City, where he really wanted to get back to as soon as possible.

    Bag of carrots in hand, and trying hard (mediocre, fine) not to look all too disgusted by everything around him, the magician was hurrying along the pathway minding his own business.
    That was, at least, until there was a sudden sound behind him that reminded of steps. Heavy steps.
    Eliot paused, slowly turning around, expecting to find some angry farmer chasing him or something, but instead -

    "What the fuck....?"
    There was something yellowish-grey and weird looking in structure planted right there in the mud behind him. Two of them.
    And they weren't moving anymore.
    With a frown, Eliot followed the yellow things with his eyes upwards, where eventually a ball of feathers followed and -
    "Oh my -...cock."
    It was a chicken. A black and white feathered rooster.
    Those "yellow things" were the legs of a chicken. But not the kind that's been chasing him he's been chasing through the fields in the childhood he refused to acknowledge. No, this beast was about a hundred times as big in size, and it was following him.

    Well, so that just happened.
    Swallowing and adjusting the collar of his coat, Eliot slowly turned around to continue on his way. Ignorance was bliss, they all said, and was there really a gigantic chicken following him when he said it wasn't ?
    But there were the footsteps again, hurried, closer now, and closing in steadily.
    Clearly, this wouldn't do.
    Abruptly, Eliot paused again, turning around towards his feathered admirer.
    "Stop. Go away. I don't need you."
    Shockingly enough, the chicken couldn't have cared less.

    Instead it paused for only a moment, before suddenly doing nothing other than running towards the magician, who realized quickly that being squished by a giant chicken foot was definitely not how he wanted to die.
    Instinctively, Eliot raised his hand, performing a quick, rushed spell with a motion of his fingers, and abruptly the chicken came to a halt a mere step away from him.
    The breath he's been holding escaped him a little shakily.
    "All this stress will give me premature wrinkles..."
    The words were mumbled under same shaky breath, as Eliot stared at the chicken and wondered just what the hell he was supposed to do with a now-mind-controlled 20 feet tall chicken.

    He definitely wasn't keeping this thing.


    _______________________
    _______________________​


    Half an hour later, Eliot was entering Ark City with a 20 foot tall chicken.

    Thanks to magical (harmless) mind control, the beast was following him loyally, but no matter how much he tried, a 20 ft tall chicken was quite something, and chickens weren't exactly known for being the most careful walkers.
    Ark City was a busy place with a lot of buildings, and while Eliot realized he wouldn't be able to keep that thing in his garden, exactly, he couldn't really take it anywhere else at the moment, either.

    Overall, the entire situation really promised trouble.
    And he didn't have to wait long for that trouble, either.

    There was an ugly cracking sound behind him, and Eliot winced in dawning realization of what had just happened. Really, he wanted to just keep going once he's turned around to see that his gigantic chicken had stepped into someone else's garden and ruined the fence and likely whatever else was in same garden - but sadly, he and his beastly chicken weren't exactly given a chance to sneak away in more-or-less silence.

    The door to the poor person's now-ruined garden swung open, and Eliot mumbled a swear under his breath, wondering just how the hell he was supposed to explain the situation now.
    "Uhm....do you have a moment to talk about gigantic chickens in your neighborhood?"
    Offering a wide smile, the magician turned around gracefully to face the probably upset owner of the garden.
    How was that spell about memory erasure again?
    Oh wait.
    There wasn't one.
    (None he knew how to perform, anyway).

     
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  2. Abigail Hobbs

    Abigail Hobbs Hannibal

    Posts:
    231
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Student
    Race:
    Human
    Age:
    18
    Abigail had been wandering since she'd been separated from Hannibal, getting by however she could. When she passed a home with a garden, and no one else around, she hopped over the fence and knelt down by the plants. Surely no one would miss a few vegetables. Maybe they'd assume an animal ate them. She almost felt like an animal; she certainly felt like one without the luxuries her father figure had provided. She reached her hand out towards the plants, imagining them roasting alongside a giant chicken in a gourmet oven. She was about to pick one when she heard a strange noise.

    Abigail looked up and saw a literal giant chicken approaching. She figured she must have been hallucinating. She also had powerful instincts, especially where the strange events of Pandora were concerned. There could be some strange beast that her hungry mind was letting her see as poultry. She ran behind the house in the hope that the back door was unlocked. When she couldn't open the door, she stayed put, trying to hide as she heard the sound of giant chicken steps.

    Abigail peeked back around the house slowly, when she heard someone approach. She was preparing to run if it was the home owner or some kind of authority figure. When she saw it was Eliot, she walked over towards him slowly. She wouldn't blame him if he didn't remember her from the party. It felt like it had been so long ago; so much had changed since then.

    When he spoke, she looked at him with utter confusion. His words indicated that it really was a chicken. "Is it yours? I thought magic guys were supposed to have cute, fluffy, little bunny rabbits as pets." She joked, not mentioning that it wasn't actually her garden or even her neighbourhood.
     
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  3. Eliot Waugh

    Eliot Waugh The Magicians

    Posts:
    136
    Gender:
    Male
    Race:
    Human/Magician
    Age:
    24
    Alignment:
    Chaotic Good
    Directory:
    link

    Frankly, having somebody show up and throw an actual bible at him would not have surprised him - though in this world it probably wouldn't have been a bible, but rather some kind of ..strangely shaped..uh... carrot?
    He didn't know, really. And that was the main issue - anything was possible, and this time, for once, Eliot wasn't looking for trouble, and thus would much prefer not to stumble into it, either.

    Ever since the apocalypse though, it seemed he's had more luck than ever before (which was likely only an indication for a catastrophe soon to catch up with him, but hey, he was a simple man, he'd take what he could get), and apparently that luck was sticking around for the time being.
    Because the young woman who approached him was not a yelling housewife waving a pan at him dangerously, cussing like a Texan prisoner.

    "Abigail! Oh it's good to see you, sweetheart."
    He pulled the girl in for a brief but tight embrace if she'd let him.
    The party had been a while ago, and it had been a disaster, really - he hadn't seen the girl since, and frankly hadn't chatted as much with her during that party as he perhaps would have, had Steve not been around (he was too easily distracted by beautiful men, clearly, sue him). But after the whole world-ending-thing, it was a positive to surprise to see any half-way familiar face, especially so when it was the face of somebody he genuinely thought to be nice.

    Casting a glance towards his feathered, tall company, and back towards Abigail, the magician laughed nervously.
    "That? Ahaha, no. No no, it's not mine. What would I do with a chicken, really. This size, too. I'd take a fluffy bunny rabbit over this thing any day of the year. Uhm... no, this eh - it just followed me around, so I decided to take it along until I can figure out whom it belongs to."
    That was true enough, really.
    Though Eliot had no idea how anyone could have possibly lost a chicken as tall as a small fucking house.

    Speaking of houses -....
    Frowning, he glanced towards the home that this garden belonged to, finding some details not quite adding up about the situation.
    "Do you live here?"
    Sure, the world ending had messed up a lot of things, and suddenly people were wealthy or poor or actual robots or whatever. But this seemed a bit too big a house for that girl - and she didn't strike him as somebody who'd design her garden the way this one was designed.
    Or... had been designed, before a 20 foot tall chicken had come along.

     
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  4. Abigail Hobbs

    Abigail Hobbs Hannibal

    Posts:
    231
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Student
    Race:
    Human
    Age:
    18
    Abigail welcomed the hug and wrapped her arms around him just as tightly until he let go. It was a tremendous relief that he recognized her from the party and remembered her in a positive light. "It's good to see you too." She had to fight back happy tears. There would be no getting weepy around him this time. She focused her attention on trying to memorize every detail of the moment. Happy memories seemed hard to come by lately and details other than the massive chicken might slip her mind if she wasn't careful.

    Abigail shrugged and glanced to the chicken and back to Eliot, chuckling at the absurdity of it. What would anyone do with such a creature? "It'd be a really amazing feat if you could pull him out of a hat. Or maybe you could have Pandora's loudest alarm clock. When that guy crows in the morning, it must wake everyone." She gave it a moment of thought. She'd traveled through a few places, wandering through places in the hopes of seeing Hannibal, and never seen any place that could house giant roosters. "You're very calm for having chicken-zilla following you around. And even calmer that you'd want to find his owner. I can't imagine how big that farmer is."

    Abigail shook her head. She was a good liar, and a part of that was knowing what lies would be too easily detected. She couldn't invite him inside for a glass of water or to use the washroom if he asked. It was best to be honest. "No, I don't." She moved her hand through her hair, then soothed out a few wrinkles in her shirt, trying to look like she had a home somewhere. He mind began exploring ways to cover the truth if he asked more questions.
     
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  5. Eliot Waugh

    Eliot Waugh The Magicians

    Posts:
    136
    Gender:
    Male
    Race:
    Human/Magician
    Age:
    24
    Alignment:
    Chaotic Good
    Directory:
    link

    For a moment he thought to have seen tears shimmering in the girl's eyes, and he'd be lying saying he didn't understand where those were coming from.
    Everything was such a mess, it was good to see somebody who was familiar, somebody who was liked, too.
    In some way to comfort the girl, Eliot grasped her hand, giving it a soft squeeze - he didn't know what she's been through what with the world ending and all, but he wouldn't want her to feel alone in this place.

    When Abigail mentioned the chicken possibly waking everybody in the neighborhood in the mornings, Eliot realized he had not, in fact, considered this yet.
    For a moment he stared up towards his feathered company; he didn't think his neighbors would be very approving of a chicken yelling them out of bed when the sun rose. So he had to figure out a way to prevent that from happening.
    He probably would have frowned at the bird for a little while longer, if Abigail wouldn't have spoken again.

    Chicken-zilla. Beautiful. Maybe he should just call it Zilla, too.
    Chuckling somewhat nervously, Eliot felt a little stupid for not having considered the issue of how big the farmer likely was, either. But frankly, he's felt much calmer before having considered any of those complications.

    Trying to calm his own nerves, he waved off Abigail's words with a dismissive but friendly sound, and a wave of his hand.
    "I'm sure it's just a normal sized chicken that's magically been enlarged for some reason. I just need to figure out a way to make it undone again."
    This was definitely more likely than an actual gigantic chicken - but mainly, Eliot was just hoping that it was more likely.

    But enough of that chicken. He couldn't change anything about it for the time being, so there really was no use trying to get behind the whole matter this instant, either.
    When Abigail confirmed his suspicion that she did not, in fact, live here, the magician looked at the girl for a moment, but decided not to ask what she was doing here.
    It was none of his business, and he didn't think Abigail to be somebody who'd steal or break into other peoples' gardens and/or houses if she didn't have good reason to do so.
    Perhaps she didn't have a place to stay at all - the apocalypse had left enough people homeless.

    Instead of nudging her to spill what was the matter though, Eliot just offered another warm smile instead.
    "How about some lunch at mine? Once... I found a place to safely park chicken-zilla here."
    It was the least he could offer, and he had a feeling the girl could really use a warm meal and perhaps a hot shower, too.

     
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  6. Abigail Hobbs

    Abigail Hobbs Hannibal

    Posts:
    231
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Student
    Race:
    Human
    Age:
    18
    Abigail had to chuckle too, at his causal words. He made solving the chicken dilemma sound so simple. "Oh, that's all. Of course. Maybe you just need to wean him off his diet of magic beans and wonderland cakes. Or keep away from magic growth ray guns and find a shrink ray instead." She said with a teasing grin. It had to be more complicated than his words had suggested.

    As Eliot looked at Abigail, she felt certain he was already curious and beginning to suspect the truth. There would be questions directed at her at any moment. She could almost feel it. At least he didn't seem the type to report her to the authorities.

    Various lies ran through her mind. She could claim she was visiting a friend. That could backfire if he knew anyone in the neighborhood. She could say she was working there as a gardener. Her clothes were already a bit dirty and she did know a bit about growing plants. It brought bad many memories of Hannibal's 'gardening' with the snails. In her mind, that had destroyed her family. And she had no gardening tools with her. That was the wrong lie.

    Whatever story she told had to be as reasonable an explanation as possible. She could tell Eliot she was out for a walk, saw the chicken moving towards her, panicked and try to hide by the nearest house. That could work; it had an element of truth in it. That always helped with credibility. She could add in a few details to really sell it. She was formulating the perfect story when he invited her to lunch instead of asking her anything further about her presence in the garden.

    "I'd love that." She replied honestly, with a relieved smile on her face. Real food, the chance to eat indoors and friendly company sounded like a dream come true. All they had to do was find a massive chicken coop.
     
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