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You like fire, my blood like gasoline

Discussion in 'Pandora, Year 1 - 7' started by Hanzo Shimada, May 11, 2018.

  1. Hanzo Shimada

    Hanzo Shimada Overwatch

    Posts:
    243
    Gender:
    male
    Occupation:
    Ramen Shop owner/ dog dad
    Age:
    38
    Alignment:
    Lawful Neutral
    Directory:
    link

    May 10th, Year 7
    @Jesse McCree

    Coming here shouldn't have felt like this: exciting and strangely terrifying. It wasn't the first time he came here to Horizon; actually, the first time laid already five months back, a realization which made the whole situation only more unearthly and, while it should have been the opposite, put the time frame in which they knew each other oddly out of perspective.
    Good Gods, has it really been that long already? Five goddamn months? And he still felt a rush of excitement while walking down the already way too familiar road, like a teenage girl on the way to her first prom: a weird mix of ecstasy and horror.
    No, it wasn't the first time he had walked this path, and he damn hoped that it wouldn't be the last time either. For that he...yes, he liked Jesse too much for that. He liked him so much in fact, that he decided to take a day off and visit him personally on his birthday, a gift hidden deep within his quiver, which he nowadays misused as some kind of jute-bag. There was no need to take his reliant bow with him when he was visiting the cowboy, no other than maybe show off his archery skills, McCree seemed to like those. But he figured that there would be no opportunity for that kind of shenanigans today. He came here with a gift... and an offering.

    Five months, almost five damn months.
    Just think about it. How absolutely absurd was that?
    Hanzo still could clearly remember when this shamelessly handsome stranger walked into the pub he worked at at the time, how his stupid spurs jingled as he stepped in, rudely overhearing the conversation he held with one of his co-workers, sticking his nose into other people's business. At least he had paid for his drink back then.
    But comparing it with now? How they have spent so much time together in the days and weeks following their little adventure, how tired and overwhelmed he has been thinking about this man and how exhausting it was to sort out these foreign feelings he never even dreamed of experiencing.
    And of course, he remembered the night Santiago came by, seeing nothing but the drunk, depressed mess he had been, actually talking him into trying to see how things would develop.

    Yes, right now he was reliving all these events again, trying to picture how everything would be now if he never invited Jesse to the ball, if he never granted him shelter, if he never consulted a neutral party, if he never tried to be with him.
    The result was more than unsatisfying; and why was he thinking of McCree's absence right now if he should be celebrating the exact opposite of it? He should be glad, thankful to have such a sparkling personality in his life, and not dwell on grim what-if scenarios!
    Well...maybe all this really seemed to be too good to be true, maybe it was something he could never picture in his life, and was now afraid to loose. Maybe he would loose it today...who knew?
    No, not the time, not the place to think about it, he reminded himself as he finally reached the door which would always be open for him, where he would always be welcome, lovingly so.
    The fear of what may come slowly ebbed away as Hanzo bravely knocked on the wooden entrance, his heavy heart suddenly feeling so much lighter as he heard familiar footsteps approaching, his stern frown softening, turning into a sweetly excited smile.

    He liked this feeling way too much to let it go, and he liked the person behind them even more. No, he absolutely couldn't afford to loose him.
     
    Jesse McCree likes this.
  2. Jesse McCree

    Jesse McCree Overwatch

    Posts:
    60
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Bounty Hunter/Gunslinger
    Race:
    Human
    Age:
    36
    Alignment:
    Chaotic Good

    Jesse had wondered for all of a few minutes how Hanzo had known today was his birthday, before recalling of course that Genji knew what day his birthday was. Genji had attended more than his fair share of birthday celebrations for him in the past, had seen him sloppy drunk and square dancing and seen him riding mechanical bulls and all the other nonsense he used to do all the time because it was fun. He’d been young then, they had both been and fun wasn’t something they were really allowed to take into the field with them. Yeah, they’d had plenty of adventures back in the old days, Genji mostly trailing along to document all of Jesse’s questionable life choices-- but he’d joined in on a fair share of them as well.

    So of course Genji remembered, and of course Genji would have told Hanzo that it was coming up. It wasn’t like Jesse had been trying to keep it a secret or anything, he wasn’t ashamed of it or anything like that. But-- birthday parties always seemed to be made for the young. Once you hit a certain age, your birthday just became another day to you, a day you thought about your past and maybe your future and you probably felt a little bit older, reminded again of how quickly time felt like it was passing at times but-- still, just another day. Nothing special or even worthy of much remarking upon. Of course, it was also true that this past few years, in his world at least-- he hadn’t had much worth celebrating. He’d lived the life of a tumbleweed, always on the move-- running from his problems really, no family and no real friends. He’d put some justice in the world and move on, he kept writing both under his pseudonym which he published online and also for himself, just documenting his thoughts so the passing of time felt real. It was a lonely life but one he could feel good about, accountable to himself and able to hold his own moral code, decide for himself who needed to be taught better that they weren’t above the law of the land.

    There hadn’t been any point in making a note of his birthday though, it had been too dangerous to have any sort of stable social life or to keep in steady contact with anybody in particular. He traded emails at times, mostly for business. He had flngs on occasion-- a night or two with somebody nice looking and interested. Nobody he let close enough that they would know or care about his birthday.

    Things were different here in Pandora and he was happy about that, it was nice not being a fugitive, it was nice building a relationship with others again, setting down roots. All the things that meant building a home really-- something that Jesse hadn’t had for years and something he had ignored how much he had missed. And part of that feeling of home was coming to mean one Hanzo Shimada. A man he had once hated, sight unseen, years earlier when he’d only known him as Genji’s would be murderer.

    It seems like there is so much time between then and now, but it’s only been 5 months since they met. Not really all that long at all but-- long enough to change a lot. Long enough to have grown close, to develop feelings, long enough that Jesse is sure he’s at least halfway in love with Hanzo. His sharp wit, the way he understood so many stories from Jesse’s past and didn’t judge him for them, didn’t weigh Jesse out by his mistakes alone. The way he looked at him sometimes, like Jesse was something new and unknown and amazing. How talented he was, dangerously competent and Jesse knew he didn’t have to worry himself sick because Hanzo was more than capable of being badass all by himself.

    They were well matched and it was easy to be with him-- easy to spend time in Hanzo’s orbit. It felt nicer, just coexisting around him, made his life richer and warmer. Still-- Hanzo is content to casually pursue it and Jesse let’s him. No need to rush in and scare off a good thing, no sense in pushing his luck for more than Hanzo could give. The truth is that Jesse has never been good at this sort of thing---sex? Sure. He might even say he’s a bit of an expert at all the ways that can go, lots of variants and they always ended the same- Jesse, alone. He doesn’t want this to end that way.

    So he let’s Hanzo control the pace because-- Hanzo is better at that. He kisses him hello and goodbye at this point, they talk about all kinds of things, sometimes important and sometimes not. Jesse can’t quit the smile he gets when they’re together. He’s utterly and completely charmed-- and he’d be a helluva lot more concerned about that if it didn’t seem to be going well.

    He doesn’t even remember the knock on the door, or nearly tripping over his feet to get there to open it. Just that one minute he’s hoping to see Hanzo soon and the next he’s there, smiling at Jesse from the other side of the door.

    ”Hey Sugar,” he greets, leaning in to press a kiss to Hanzo’s cheek. ”Are you my birthday cake because you sure look sweet enough to be?” A purr, just a little suggestive but mostly just playful.

     
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  3. Hanzo Shimada

    Hanzo Shimada Overwatch

    Posts:
    243
    Gender:
    male
    Occupation:
    Ramen Shop owner/ dog dad
    Age:
    38
    Alignment:
    Lawful Neutral
    Directory:
    link


    And there he was, the man himself, Jesse McCree; tall, handsome, and ridiculously charming as always. Jesse loved calling him all kinds of pet names, and while it did take some time to adjust to them, Hanzo found himself enjoying those little nice gestures more and more as time passed. Silly names which meant nothing suddenly gained such a heavy meaning to him that he felt stupid for ever rejecting him. Sweet whispers which made his head spin in a weird but pleasing way, made his heart beat faster and his demons quieter.
    He chuckled as a response to the typical greeting, a faint blush creeping up his face as the cowboy shamelessly continued to sugar coat him further; all before he even stepped through the door.

    "My dear, aren't you impatient with your desert today," a smug grin spread on his face, its only intention to playfully tease the other in a way he probably was already used to. Hanzo stepped forward, tip toed a little to be able to place a chaste kiss onto Jesse's lips, smiling against him as he lazily wrapped both his arms around the silly man whom he grew to actually like and appreciate to a degree where like was probably an understatement; these were feelings he tried to figure out for so so long, and finally came to terms with. Hopefully it would stay that way through the end, low-key afraid that he might chicken out in the last possible moment, which wouldn't be a surprise, but a damn shame nonetheless.

    For a moment Hanzo stood still, only embracing Jesse and inhaling his calming scent, a scent he grew attached to, a scent which eased his anxieties and gave him a feeling of comfort and safety.
    "I missed you," his voice was nothing but a tender whisper as he remained in this position for a little longer before pulling back and looking the man of the hour in his beautiful face, "I missed you a lot, as a matter of fact. May I come in?"

    Naturally the question was more of a necessary formality than anything else, since he knew that Jesse's door would always be open for him; he trusted him, and Hanzo knew that. It was a mutual feeling they shared, one the archer would never even dream of betraying. Even if this day wouldn't go as he imagined it to, Hanzo hoped that the friendship they established would still stand, because it was one he valued more than he probably should.
    No, he would not turn away from this now; a commitment is a commitment and it was time he finally embraced it as such.

    That stupid grin still didn't vanish off his face, as if it was stuck there, but it were not news. The cowboy had this effect on him, making him genuinely happy, making him feel valued, appreciated, loved. Of course he was getting the same feeling from other friends and his brother as well, but for some reason this felt different, like more, better.

    "So, birthday boy, how are you doing? Enjoying your little you day so far, hmm?"
    Honestly speaking, he wanted to get done with the casual formalities as quickly as possible and get to the core of why he was here. Well, to celebrate Jesse's birthday with him, obviously, but as the tight grip around his quiver suggested, that was not the only thing he came here for.
     
    Jesse McCree likes this.
  4. Jesse McCree

    Jesse McCree Overwatch

    Posts:
    60
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Bounty Hunter/Gunslinger
    Race:
    Human
    Age:
    36
    Alignment:
    Chaotic Good

    Jesse knew he was too much, he had to know-- he’d heard it enough all throughout his life. He was always too much, too bold, too wanting, too reckless, too good at what he did. Always and forever being taken the measurement of in everything and constantly coming up as just a little too much to be dealt with. His grandma had used to say it too, voice grumbling good naturedly in his youth and then-- then less good naturedly as he’d gotten a little older. ‘You’re like the coyote in the old myths, you want everything too quickly-- when will you learn that sometimes you have to be patient with the world, Jessito. You can’t take everything through trickery.’ He’d tried to be, he honestly had --people probably didn’t think he meant that but he did. It was so hard though for him- to sit, to wait, to hope that things would get better his hands growing numb and tingly from having to sit on them so long. Waiting had taught him one thing-- you never seemed to wait for things to get better, only for them to get worse. So he’d stopped waiting because here was the thing, Jesse would rather be an active part of his own downfall than to be a passive part of his own success.

    It’s hard for him to keep his hands off Hanzo and he doesn’t even mean-- not in a dirty way, though of course, kinda that way too. He meant it more in the sense that Hanzo was one of the better things to happen to him, the first fella who’d ended up in his arms and he seemed to want to actually stay. Instead of taking his pleasure and casting Jesse aside as was the norm…. Hanzo had sunk into his arms and had seemed to want to make himself comfortable there. For once it seemed he’d found a guy who didn’t want to just take whatever Jesse was willing to give and run with it like a thief, and Jesse was so silently grateful for just that much that he was fine with the idea of Hanzo carving out a place for himself, in Jesse’s arms and in his life. He’s fine with Hanzo taking his time with it too-- that wasn’t even a lie because he could tell that Hanzo doesn’t have a lot of experience with these things, with letting himself be close to people. He didn’t even mean romantically necessarily just-- it had been clear from the start that Hanzo didn’t let many people get close to him, it was work to earn his confidence.

    It’d been a nice journey, this thing with Hanzo--more scenic than he would’ve imagined but he’d be lying to say that every time Hanzo got close that it wasn’t getting harder and harder to make himself let go. That was him all over though, always too greedy, wanting it all too fast. It’s hard to train himself not to take all he can grab and run as fast and far as he could with something. Like he’d been born with the sneaky suspicion that if he asked for something it wouldn’t be given, not freely at least.

    ”What can I say, darlin’? I’m a man with a sweet tooth and maybe I got myself a bit of a craving right about now.” He kept it playful, otherwise it’d just be way too clear that he wasn’t really kidding at all. Jesse was always aware, always careful because this whole moving slowly bit is different for him and he could appreciate that Hanzo’s a bit people wary, from what he’s been told---well, he had every right in the world to be wary of others.

    Hanzo pressing up into him with a peck of a kiss is enough to distract him and he hummed happily as he returned it, innocent and sweet because he couldn’t just throw himself at Hanzo. (Though sometimes he really kind of wanted to, just put himself at Hanzo’s mercy and hope he took some pity on his fool self.) The smile is easy and genuine when Hanzo’s strong arms twine around him, pull him close and Hanzo doesn’t seem in any rush to pull away, so Jesse wasn’t either. He slipped his metal arm gently around Hanzo’s waist, the other trailed up, unable to help himself but to play with those little silky untameable pieces of his dark hair that always seemed to escape the tie no matter what Hanzo did with them. Just a little tease that Hanzo had some of the same wildness in him that Jesse had himself, even if Hanzo’s was hidden better under a strict sense of duty and self-control.

    You could probably knock Jesse over with a feather-- the way Hanzo says he misses him, so tenderly whispered and sweetly true that he could hardly believe it was a statement meant for him. ”And I missed you right back,” he whispered back honestly, hand in Hanzo’s hair trailing down to cup his face, thumb trailing over the sharply groomed edge of his facial hair before dropping away. He stepped back despite his reluctant because Hanzo had asked to come in.

    ”You’re always welcome here, thought you knew that much by now. I ain’t exactly subtle in my affections I know.” Jesse said because it was true and stepped back to open the door, allowing Hanzo to come inside.

    It wasn’t a fancy residence, of course, Horizon being pretty rustic and on the edge of wild itself. It was comfortable though and it suited Jesse just fine, after years of living in Overwatch Dormitories which were relatively compact, or living out of a suitcase while on the run--- let’s just say Jesse had never needed a fancy or big space. Just somewhere he could call his own, somewhere he could be comfortable.

    ”Sure am, but I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you my birthday just got a lot better for you being here with me. Feel like I actually got somewhere worth celebrating now.” It was easier to be in the celebratory mood when there was somebody there with you to celebrate with after all.

     
    Hanzo Shimada likes this.